That gorgeous ring is on your finger, and every wedding dream you have ever had is whirring around in your head. You can not wait to start touring venues, booking vendors, and planning.
Stop. Right. There.
Why you ask? Because nothing good ever comes out of rushing into things. I am here to give you some advice on some things that you need to stop doing during your engagement, not only to help you avoid making big mistakes but to help you enjoy this time a little more.
Your engagement is a precious time in your life, so kick back, relax, and avoid doing these things.
1. It Takes A Village.
Stop trying to do everything by yourself. When you think of your wedding morning, do you envision it full of packing cars full of totes of decorations, rushing around setting tables, check up on vendors…*insert one of the million wedding day tasks here*. Or do you see it as a stress-free, beautiful morning full of mimosas, your best friends, and preparing to marry the person of your dreams? Hiring a coordinator is an investment, and it is so well worth it. Also, remember, that just because your venue comes with a “venue coordinator” that does not mean that you have a Day Of Coordinator. There is a large difference between the two, and it is commonly mistaken that they are the same. More on that over at this blog post. One of the biggest things we hear at the end of every wedding is “Thank you for making it so that I could enjoy and soak in every moment of the day” then you hear them telling their friends “I didn’t have to do anything, I got to relax and enjoy it all”
A lot of money is spent on your wedding day. Make sure you are going to enjoy it and be able to soak it in. Because you will blink, and it will be 1 am and it is over.
2. Don’t Rush The Process.
I know, you have followed that Photographer for as long as you remember, you admire them more than you say. Your wedding day dreams are full of gold chiavari chairs, flower walls, and a plated dinner full of filet mignon and lobster.
You need to take a moment to interview and research all vendors. Acquire multiple quotes, explore your options. Sometimes this helps you to fall even more in love with your top choice! Ensure that you are looking into prior client experiences, read reviews, and truly make sure that you click with each vendor.
Also, ensure that you have set up a solid budget. You don’t want to blow the budget on $10 chairs or $3,000 flower installs, and then have no money to put towards other things.
Working with a planner, like us, allows you to create a budget and game plan, as well as ensure that you get your non-negotiables while also having a well-rounded wedding.
3. Put Down The Latest Copy Of The Knot, and Stop Scouring Style Me Pretty Until 3 AM!
Stop living in visions of weddings that are not your reality. Realize that wedding blogs and magazines receive thousands of submissions every day and are very particular about which ones they take. What you are seeing is their idea of the best. It is not, however, your best. Your budget will thank you, I promise!
Instead, meet with your vendors and dream up ideas with them that not only match your unique vision and aesthetic but fit your budget.
You would be surprised how creative your vendor team can get!
4. It Is Not All Wedding, All The Time.
If you spend the next 18 months talking only about your wedding to friends and family, it might not go over so well. Don’t forget that everyone else is living their life, and as much as they love hearing your plans, they want you to be interested in them as well. Don’t forget to spend time with your bridesmaids outside of the wedding bubble. Go out for drinks, plan a girls day out, go see a movie or a band. Text or call your friends and ask them how they are doing, see how their kids are doing, or how their new job is going. See if you can take your mom to lunch and talk about anything but the wedding.
Take your fiance on a date, plan a weekend getaway where you don’t talk about wedding plans.
Don’t forget about the personal connections you have with all of these people. They love you, and they are here for you, but they still strive for a 2 sided friendship.
If you have a wedding planner, talk to them until you are blue in the face about the wedding. We love to hear dreams, plans, and ideas. We want to help you de-escalate situations, solve problems, and make things easier. Your bridesmaids and family do as well, just not for 18 months straight 🙂
5. Remember The Reason For All Of This.
At the end of the day, when all of the linens are bagged up, the decor is boxed up, and your hair is falling out after a night of dancing, all you have is the person standing by your side. So don’t forget to soak in this time. Enjoy being a fiance’! Do not take advantage, or treat the person poorly that is marrying you! Wedding Planning can get very stressful, and you have to sometimes step back, and remember the reason for all of this. Take a night off from the DIY projects and go on a date. Put down the glue gun and remember the love you have for each other.
Bonus Tip: Not All Things Are In Your Control.
It might rain, therefore your ceremony might wind up in your plan B space. It may also mean you might not get those beloved outdoor photos. Someone may get sick and not be able to make it. Transportation may be running behind schedule. Bustles may break. Someone may say something inappropriate or embarrassing.
It is okay. It will all be okay. Just breathe, relax, and love on that new hubby or wifey of yours.
That’s the reason we got into this whole thing right? Because you love them so much you decided to make them your forever.
Don’t forget that.